Tips for new Facebook parents - via The Online Mom
Tips for new Facebook parents
Earlier this week we wrote about how you can monitor your child on Facebook. But what about setting the account up in the first place?
If you are not a Facebook user yourself, it's easy to be blindsided by a sudden request for an account from your child. A flat refusal might work for a while, but with over 70 percent of teens using Facebook on a regular basis, your child may start to feel left out. The last thing you want him or her to do is resent your intransigence and open an account without your knowledge.
If you are unfamiliar with Facebook or are not sure what's the right approach for a tween or young teen, here are a few tips to help get you started:
Use your own e-mail address to open the account
If you are setting up an account for a tween or young teen, use your own e-mail address or an e-mail address that you both have access to. This way, you will see friend requests as they come in and any other notifications like tags (your child's name) in posts or photos. You will also know if your child tries to change the password!
Quality not quantity
When you first open a Facebook account, there is a tendency to equate the number of friends you have with how popular you are. That usually results in a mad dash to friend everyone you know...and quite a few people you don't! Resist the temptation. Building a friend list slowly but surely will make for a much more satisfying Facebook experience.
Don't allow Facebook to choose friends for you
When you first open an account, Facebook will suggest lots of friends for you based on previous Facebook accounts run off the same computer (very sneaky!) or based on the Profile information you provide. It will also ask for permission to search your e-mail account, so it can suggest even more friends.
Ignore them all! You should carefully add friends based on your own preferences, not Facebook's.
Choose the Profile Photo carefully
The photo on your child's Facebook profile is very important. It can say volumes about how they see themselves, as well as what you, as a parent, think about them. Cutesy is OK, provocative is a no-no. If you're not comfortable having a photo of your child up there at all, then think about using a picture of a favorite pet, or maybe an avatar. (That's a cartoon-style image, not the tall blue lady from the movie!)
Be selective about the Profile Information
Although the account will be live straight away, you still need to complete the Profile Information. Click on Profile on the menu bar and click Info on the left-hand side. Here, you can edit your Basic Information, Personal Information, Contact Information, Education, Work and the things you are interested in like Sports and Arts & Entertainment.
When filling out your Profile Information, you should assume that everything you complete will be visible to others. Although Facebook allows you to hide Contact Information, you should leave that blank anyway.
Privacy Settings
Once you have completed the Profile Information, go back to the menu bar and click on Account. From the dropdown menu, click on Privacy Settings. Facebook will give you a brief overview of all the Privacy Settings options. Most Privacy Settings are set by default to Everyone. Here, it's recommended that you change all the settings to Only Friends.
On the Apps, Games ans Websites page, click on Edit Settings next to Public search and uncheck the Enable public search box. This will make sure your child's Facebook information is not searchable by Google or other search engines.
Remember, Facebook has a strong tendency towards openness, which may be fine later in life. When your child starts out in the social networking world, the emphasis should be on privacy.
Be careful about adding older Friends
Be careful about who you and your child add as friends. That 19-year-old cousin might be a great guy at Thanksgiving dinners and family reunions but if he's just started college and likes to party, there may be things on his Facebook page that you would rather your child didn't see. Remember, Facebook works both ways: Your child will be able to see everything that is posted to her friends' pages and even to some friends of friends' pages.
Teach what's appropriate
Once your child's account is up-and-running, spend some time together discussing what's appropriate to write or post and what's best left off the site. Teach them to ask permission before posting photos of other people. (Particularly photos of Mommy in a swimsuit!) Talk about updates and photos that are posted by your child's friends and what you like or don't like about them.
As we suggested before, set-up the right way, Facebook can provide an invaluable opportunity for parents to teach cyber awareness and appropriate online behavior. Grab the opportunity before it's too late!
Do you have other tips for kids – and their parents – starting out on Facebook? Share them with The Online Mom!
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Nice intro for Facebook beginners
